What are you thinking?

Winning Thinking is the book that teaches you the powerful thought techniques to maximize your command of the Law of Attraction. We are what we think we are.  Learning how to control what you think is the key.

If you are looking for techniques that work consider this;

I too had a terrible time controlling my thinking. I was a successful lawyer for nearly 20 years when on 4/1/03 I collapsed and was rushed to the hospital.  I had an emergency colonoscopy, died twice during the surgery, had 5 cancerous polyps removed, underwent further testing and discovered I was dying from pancreas, liver and colon cancers.  Nice.  I was NOT a candidate for treatment or further surgery and was sent home to die.  I was depressed and my family was sure I was suicidal.  I had lost 60 pounds and was withering away fast.  They had me arrested and imposed a conservatorship on me and I was thrown into the looney bin.  I managed to talk my way out of there after a few weeks and was released.  By think my digestive system was shot.  My body was completely jaundiced and the whites of my eyes were orange.  The pain was horrific.  I got home and finally realized that I was indeed going to die.  I called hospice.  They were shocked since the patient rarely makes that call to them.  I then did my funeral arrangements 7/16/03.  I continued to get worse and was finally facing the end.  Hospice had brought out the "comfort pack" which is the final stage where you get the maximum morphine up until you expire.  On 10/16/03 I had a massive stroke leaving me in a coma for several weeks.  When I woke up I was not lucid and was paralyzed.  Some time in January 2004 the massive blood clot in my brain released and my lucidity started to return.  It was an awakening I can only liken to being a newborn baby.  I couldn't do a thing for myself and I was now in my third nursing home in an end of life program as the cancers were not going away.

So how can things be worse?  How can you find a positive from all that?  I had to relearn EVERYTHING from scratching my nose, walking, talking, reading, writing...all of it.  Sure it was easier as my memory gradually returned.  The physical aspects were next to impossible.  In Feb 2004 my cancer was gone.  I had lost everything financially.  What I didn't pay in medical I gave away to family.  I had no use for material things any longer.  I became determined to walk again and made my goal to leave the nursing home and return to a "normal" life.  It was WORK!!!  My determination never faltered.  Each step was agony but everyone was a win.  On 6/11/04 I WALKED out of Jordan's Nursing Home and returned to life on the outside.  I was the only one to leave alive since the place was opened in 1964.

How do you overcome the negative?  I wrote it all in a book, Winning Thinking .  I share the techniques you can learn immediately to take total control of all you think.  I am living proof of the power of the mind.  My doctors have no explanation.  Hospice can't believe I didn't die.  Read this book and practice what is in there everyday for the rest of your life.  You have every right to be happy.  You choose your reality.  Choose happy!  I do every morning.  Remember, the most important thing a human can do is.....................BLINK!

Dr. Mike

LIFE TIMELINE

Reframing your thoughts to be happy almost all of the time.

By: Dr. Michael Cortson

          Over the centuries one thing seems to be unanimous if you look at the writings of the great scholars, “these are trying times.”  Man throughout time has always had that in common, trying times.  Even when we look back at times that we refer to as “the good old days” the people living through that period would tell you “these are trying times.” I doubt there would be much disagreement with this harmless premise.  Today, as always, “these are trying times.”

          With that said; how do people cope with these times and better still how do they improve upon them?  One first has to understand the nature of man’s existence right from the start.  I have found there are two components to man’s existence; 1) being alive, and 2) living.  One would argue that these components are one in the same.  I offer for semantics sake the argument that there has to be a distinction made between the two and I should define the principles.  “Being alive” is the physical, biological components of the body functions.  Deep set in the inner core of the brain we find man’s involuntary functions, i.e. breathing, heartbeat, gag reflex etc.  “Living” is man’s awareness and interaction with the world around him which of course is sustained via being alive.  So the distinction should not be ignored.  Living is thought.  Thought is the chemical reactions within the structure of the brain that is ever changing and subject to all sorts of impressions voluntary and involuntary.

         It is a well settled premise that man thinks in pictures accompanied by sound and then closely followed by touch and smell.  Everything one has been exposed to from birth is stored in the brain just like so many records in a jukebox.  By way of illustration if I asked you, “Who was your favorite teacher?” you would immediately start gathering up all of the teacher memories you have in mind and instantly make a choice as to which one was your favorite.  Once you made that choice you would then start recalling or “seeing” that person’s face again, the classroom, and then the sound of the person’s voice until the picture was complete.  Now what I just did was “push your buttons”.  We all are familiar with the phrase.  I pressed your “favorite teacher” button and you played the record.  That is how your brain works.

          Each day our buttons are pushed all day long.  And we push quite a few ourselves.   That is not to say that pushing buttons is always a negative thing to do.  Certainly if a golf ball was flying out of control at some innocent person you would quickly press your own “fore” button then scream the word out thereby pressing the other person’s “fore” button in hopes of having that person get out of harm’s way.  A closer analysis of this scenario reveals that when we pressed our own “fore” button that was a choice.  CHOICE is the key to advanced critical thinking.  Once we were confronted with this trying situation of an errant golf shot that stimulus pressed the button in us to yell “fore”.  We had been taught at some point in our lives that if we hit a golf shot that could hit someone else it was proper to yell “fore” and we “instinctively” yelled the word.  I submit that this was not “instinct” but more properly defined as a finely tuned choice made so quickly, since time is of the essence under those circumstances, we “programmed” ourselves to “react” as fast as if we were trying to buzz in with the correct question on television’s “Jeopardy”. 

          Man prizes his ability to choose his thoughts to a point where they are almost automatic.  “Almost” is the key here.  We all tend to revere those who can muster up the correct answer to a complex question the fastest. 

         Another example is preparing for a spelling bee.  We try to cram as many correctly spelled words in our head as possible.  In a spelling bee time is generally not an issue.   Of course commonly spelled words come to each of us faster than obscure ones.  The process we go through in recording these words in preparation for the spelling bee is exactly the same process we use for everything we learn.  We learn to cook, read, spell, being happy, angry, sad etc… all the same way.  I deliberately included emotions.  Just as we choose to record the words in our mind for instant recall when we hear the word presented to us at the spelling bee, so too do we do the same thing with our emotions.  Emotions are prize possessions.  We love those who make us laugh or smile.  We hate those who are nasty and mean to us and make us angry or sad.  First rule of thinking and taking control of yourself; NO ONE MAKES YOU ANYTHING!  YOU DO IT TO YOURSELF!

        Our emotion buttons are also programmed throughout our lives.  We all have certain words or phrases if directed at us press our angry button.  Our fear button can easily be pressed by our boss with, “You’re fired!”  Fear of death is the strongest motivating force that keeps all living things thriving.  We all have that record hiding back there with the buttons blacked out so no one can press them.  What if you could have someone actually and seriously press those “You’re fired!” buttons and you could feel calm and not threatened? 

         The “You’re fired!” record can’t be erased.  Most all of our records sit intact unless some organic injury or disease attacks them.  So how can we keep that “You’re fired!” record from being played thereby causing us all sorts of stress and anxiety?  The method to employ is called reframing.  We know the record is there and we pretty much know the circumstances under which that button will be pressed.  If someone else has the power to press the button and you have no way of stopping them from pressing it, what do you do?  You are the owner of your jukebox (brain).  As the owner you have the right and ability to rearrange your records in any fashion you choose.  If the “You’re fired!” button is pressed you pretty much have a record in mind right now that you are going to play.  Right now we aren’t interested in that record, let’s think about choosing a different record to play for the “You’re fired!” button.  There’s that word “choose” again.  You can right now choose a different record.  How about a nice day at the beach with the sun warm on your body, the sand is warm against your back, the breeze is soft and warm.  You hear the seagulls overheard.  The waves are slapping on the shore.  The sound of children laughing and playing can be heard.  You look out on the water and there is large white sailboat slowly passing by.  The people on the deck are waving to you yelling to you, you’re fired, and you smile and wave back.   You take a long cool drink of your drink and set it next to your blanket.  You wipe the sweat from your forehead.  Ah….now there is a wonderful place all peaceful and calm without a care in the world.  What a wonderful record!!  You just have to love it when you hear “You’re fired!”

          This won’t change the fact that you will have to find a new job.  Of course it can’t, however it puts you in a much happier frame of mind than the awful record you had sitting there in the bin before.  Now that you are no longer dreading the awful record and can play the one you love you are now free to put all your effort into something positive such as being the best you that you can be to find that next position.  “Positive” is the operative word.

          I have found that the most important question that you must continually ask yourself all day everyday and be able to answer honestly is; “What positive benefit am I getting out of doing this or thinking this way?”  Now we are all placed in “these trying times” each day.  Often times we are not able to extricate ourselves from the trying situation such as being in a confrontation with someone at work.  It happens all the time to everyone.  We all get defensive and the fur flies and we all try to protect ourselves from being “attacked”.  The conflicts in interpersonal relationships are so varied and complex no one can predict just how they will play themselves out.  We have all had situations were we have done something or said something we regret.  No one is perfect.  First and foremost you must take 100% personal responsibility for how you feel.  NO ONE MAKES YOU ANYTHING!  Remember the rule?  Even if you are wrongfully accused you can reframe how you think about it.  If I screamed at you, “You’re an elephant!!!” would you grow a trunk? of course not.  Just because someone accuses you of something or calls you something does not make it so.  Even in those circumstances where you have been caught making a mistake, which we all do, you can still choose to reframe your thinking to make it a pleasant experience.  Critical thinking comes from a complete understanding of just how you think and how you can use the tools of thought to the highest and best use.

         I recently lost my mother to Alzheimer’s disease.  No one would fault me for being sad or carrying on for weeks on end for this “loss”.  I knew what was coming.  I actually know it about everyone, I just don’t know when.  How do you prepare yourself for this?  Reframing is the key tool.  We know the “your mother’s dead” button will be pressed someday.  We have no control over that.  But we have complete control as to how we choose to think about that situation.  Just was with the “You’re fired!” buttons we do the same for your mother’s dead.  By doing so you may say that you are not allowing for your “natural grieving”.  I do not subscribe to the notion that grieving is a natural state of mind that is somehow privileged and not to be toyed with as we are to be respectful of the ones we lose through death.  I do not disrespect my mother by not falling apart at the seams crying all day and night.  In fact I celebrate the fact that I had this wonderful person it my life.  I choose to think of when I was a small boy climbing up in her lap and hearing her read me stories.  That is the record I choose to play whenever her face is seen in my mind’s eye.  My “mother” button gives me a feeling of safety and serenity rather than pain. 

         Now on the other side of the equation we can use the same technique to enhance the pleasant things in our lives.  Think of some event that you enjoy.  Get that picture in your mind and now make the picture sharper, the colors brighter and the sounds even more realistic as if you are right in the midst of it.  This can only make your good times even better.

         We often times set ourselves up for disappointment.  Expectations are just that, expectations and not reality.  We all hope for the best outcome and when we fall short of our goal our self esteem goes right down the drain as well.   Once again we set up our play list well in advance preparing for the glory and when the failure button got pressed we go right into the dumper.  You have every right to set yourself up for success and a favorable outcome.  But, you have to also be ready for the downside as well.  This is NOT negative thinking, it is preplanning for not choosing an unpleasant result if the failure button is pressed.  Sure you’ll have every right to be disappointed if things do not work out however you also have every right to be happy no matter what.  Doing the reframe ahead of time is what anyone who is successful understands.  Successful people have already gone through the failure and all of the agony that can result from that.  They had the forethought and presence of mind to be prepared for as many consequences as possible.  The record was changed ahead of time just in case that button gets pushed.  With that already taken care of you now can put all your energy and skill into achieving a successful outcome. 

          Any successful coach has to take into account every possible attack against his team and be ready with some sort of defense.  And the coach may actually need backup plans to be ready in case his first choice fails.  Winning generally is the elimination of circumstances that cause you to fail.  The only way to overcome the obstacles is to prepare for them in advance and having all sorts of options to choose from just as when you hit your errant golf shot and yelled “fore”.  There is an old adage that “the harder I practice the luckier I get.”  There is a lot of truth to that. 

         What is the commodity that winner possess aside from preparation?  I call it tenacity.  If you say you can or you say you can’t….you’re right, plain and simple.  If you stop running you will never finish a race much less win one.  Of course if you do not possess the body that can perform in the fashion necessary to win a foot race then you have to accept the fact that you can’t compete against better bodies.  “A good man knows his limitations” has a lot of credence however I do not subscribe to that as my mantra and neither should you.  Winners already have a backup plan in place just in case they fail.  You should too.

          Living is just what you think it is.  Your thoughts are your reality.  If you choose to hate you will.  If you choose to love you will.  If you choose any thought it is yours and yours alone and no matter how much you desire everyone else to share that thought you can’t do it unless others choose to think that way as well.  The power of pressing other people’s buttons goes on all day everyday.  Advertisers pay enormous amounts of cash to convince you to buy their products.  They want to push your buttons like a slot machine so your money falls out of your pocket into theirs.  He who is the cleverest and can do it to the most people makes the most money.  He who can’t convince you to alter your thinking to give it up voluntarily has to take it from you.  Men like Hitler convinced millions to give him their country.  Those who refused to give it to him were simply eliminated.  By taking 100% responsibility for your own feelings and thinking you can not be influenced by the likes of a Hitler.  There may come a time when you are faced with that and you can stand your ground and reframe your mind as necessary.  There also may come a time when your refusal to allow the records of submission to be played that the person pressing the button will take up arms against you.  Then and only then do you have the final choice physical defense.

          Our powers of reason can be used for good or evil which brings me back to the ultimate question of “What positive benefit am I getting out of doing this or thinking this way?”  I assume you all want to have a positive life.  Of course there are those who will not or cannot subscribe to having a positive outlook or approach to living. That is a shame.  However we all must be mindful that these people exist and that they often wish to cause pain in the lives of others. 

        You will note that I have not said a word about altering anyone’s beliefs.  Following one’s heart is a personal choice and whatever gives one peace and solace is a good thing even if it is contrary to my own.  So long as we can all be kind to each other I fail to see where that even becomes an issue.  The conflict and evil arises out of being so attached to one’s own beliefs that one reaches out to spread their “joy” to the rest of humanity.  Your personal relationship with your creator (for lack of a better term) is yours and no one else’s.  How you communicate or why you communicate with your creator is your business and no one else’s.  You do not need to gloat about your relationship as if it is “better” than anyone else’s.  Living is not a contest.  There is no prize waiting for any of us that we can control other than by being kind.  It takes far less effort and stress to be kind than it does to be angry.  We have a tough enough time keeping ourselves on track than to take on the rest of the world.

          Anything beyond simple mathematics is merely an opinion.  What one considers good is bad to someone else.  Just because a majority of people agree on something being good does not make it so, it is only a majority opinion.  Never fall prey to your own opinion as being the only one.  By the same token don’t adopt another’s opinion for no good reason.  As much as you like someone else telling you what is the “right” way to be they don’t like it either. We can all coexist without forcing our opinions on others.  It is the diversity of life that makes it so enjoyable not the sameness.  I had a very good friend who traveled the world.  She was frustrated as a young person when she found other cultures doing things “wrong”.  She made a little note to herself that she kept in her purse and she took it with her whenever she traveled.  It said, “You travel to see strange and different things…so don’t be surprised if you find them.”  That was in essence a reframing card.  When she hit a snag in a trip she would take that note out and read it to herself out loud.  She never had a bad trip again.

          We all have thousands of records in our jukebox and how in the world do you rearrange them all to keep your sanity?  You do them one at a time as the situations present themselves.  Oh you’ll have quiet times when you can choose to work on things that are pressing.  We all anticipate what may or may not be and we all try to cope.  With reframing you are not coping you are taking a positive active role in taking control of living.  Living is what you think it is all day everyday.  If you want to make a better world, start making you the best you that you can.  Let everyone else worry about themselves.  You have plenty to keep you busy for a lifetime.